I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
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