Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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