On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
