Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
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