Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Randomize
