when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
