Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Randomize
