just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I'm bleeding and have questions
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
