I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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