Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Are we in a gay sports bar?
Ambien. No doubt about it.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize
