dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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