I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
