I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
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