my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Randomize
