I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
third nipple confirmed
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
