we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize