haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
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