doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
