My room smells like vodka and shame
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
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