My friends, they love my intelligence
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
I'm too high and old for this...
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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