the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
