WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Randomize
