He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
