I got her a Nickelback box set.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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