holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
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I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
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I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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