I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
