I don't usually arrange sex via text message
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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