So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
Randomize
