How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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