I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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