So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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