You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize
