We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
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