I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
Screwed.edu
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The chlamydia really affected his face.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Randomize