At least make sure they are 18
Why
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
