We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize
