found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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