I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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