The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
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