i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
My cat gives me a boner
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
