We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
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