forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize