her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Is Oprah even human
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
