Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
