I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Nicole vs. Life
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
