Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Randomize
