omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
