At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
