I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
