You really coming over, don't trick.
You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
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Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
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I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I just sucked dick on a ferry
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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