i just had sex bonerless
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
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