I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
